make/do tuesday: letters to my childhood best friend

Yesterday, while in the shower (it's always where I come up with my best ideas) I starting writing a letter in my head to my childhood best friend, Megan. We were inseparable from pre-school to junior year in High School, when we kind of, I dunno- "broke-up!" We've lost touch now- the last I heard from her, she's living in New Zealand. Maybe she sneaks in and reads this blog from time to time? I don't know, but I would like that.  

No matter how far away she is and how long ago our friendship faded, I still think about her often. She's a part of so many of my stories- some life changing, some not so much, but all a definite part of the fabric that has made me who I am today.

So, for my make/do post today, I wrote her a letter (well, kind of) about one of the memories I have of her. It will be the first of many, I think. Will I send them to her? Maybe someday. For now, I'll just share it here with you. (It's a lot of text so I broke it up into an extended entry :)

Have a make/do project this week to share? Leave it in the comments, we'd love to see! 

{image from the Nat'l Library of Scotland}

Sleepwalker 

I've been thinking about your bedroom lately- you know, the one in your old house on Chance Ln? I can't put the whole room together in my mind, which seems strange considering how much time I spent there. But I remember bits of things- moments and images that I can try to piece together.

Maybe it's because so many of my memories are of your room in the dark, under that ceiling full of glowing stick-on-stars.

When I spent the night it seemed like we never actually slept. We'd lay there giggling and chatting for hours- about nothing, and everything. We'd talk about boys and who we had a crush on and if we'd ever have sex when we were older (no way! icky! totally eww!) We talked about aliens and ghosts and spirit animals. You'd fart, and I'd laugh. You'd make up silly voices, and I'd laugh.

We made sure to share every little secret with each other back then. And what plans we had for our grown-up selves! I wonder if those little girls would be proud of us now?  

(So weird, saying "us" again like that. It's been so long) 

Do you still talk in your sleep?

The first time I witnessed it was so startling! It must have been the night before our trip. You sprung from your bed and were shouting about packing and didn't know how you were going to fit your bird in your suitcase for Mexico. You were suddenly so frantic and I didn't understand what was going on. I started to get mad at you, remember? 

"We're not going to Mexico, we're going to SOUTH AMERICA (always the first to correct, I was) And you can't bring your stupid bird!"

(I really didn't like your bird.)

And then you woke up! And I realized that you had been asleep and talking nonsense. And from then on out, I got the hang of it. I started to have fun trying to egg-on conversations with you in your sleep, seeing what absurdity might slip out of your mouth. 

I remember one Sunday morning around 3am, you darted out of bed and started to rush around, trying to find your clothes "I'm gonna be late! I'm gonna be late!" You kept saying, as you continued to dream walk/talk yourself into a mild sleepy panic. "Oh no, you better hurry! Don't want to be late for school!" I goaded, laughing hysterically from under the covers as you sleepily tried to put your school clothes on over your pajamas. 

And then there was the time you slept-walk right out the back door and set off the house alarm waking everyone up, remember that? That was pretty scary, actually.

I always kinda thought you were faking it though, for attention. Or perhaps just for my amusement. 

Were you?

But no matter what strange events occurred during the night, I suppose we always fell asleep eventually.

At some point between twilight and the early dawn, you'd find us side by side in matching twin beds, under a heap of plush feather down, sleeping like sisters. 

And in the morning, the early eastern light would slowly start to pour into your windows. And your mom would come in with tired eyes, open the curtains and ask what we wanted for breakfast (pancakes, always pancakes when I slept over.) She'd give us each a kiss on the head, and tell each of us "Good morning, I love you."

And that's what I remember most about spending the night at your house. Those moments when it was evident that I was more than just your best friend, but part of the family, too.  

I wonder if we'll ever have a moment like that again- as sisters, under the stars of our own unique sky?

Comments

[Renai]

This is one of the sweetest, most heartfelt blog entries I've read in a very, very long time! Thank you for sharing your wonderful memories with us!

[Mary]

I also often think of friends past who I've lost touch with over the years. Yes, even in the internet age, it's possible to lose touch. I think about tracking them down, but I'm hesitant for so many reasons. Part of me is afraid that if I were to find out their lives hadn't turned out in the best way, I would be heartbroken I loved them so. Does that sound silly?

[Alyssa]

This is a really nice post. I also have childhood friends that i have lost touch with, they haunt my dreams and my thoughts every now and then. When I think about these friends i remember how magical that time of life seemed. So many things were exciting and new, sleepover parties were the best times and there was so much silliness and laughter.
Just last weekend I tried to re-create that by having an old fashioned sleepover with some new-ish friends. We're all in our mid-late 20's, but it was still awesome to put my bed on the living room floor, order pizza, eat candy, play games, talk, laugh, and watch silly movies from our childhood days. What would we be without friends?!

[Karl]

I am calling my long-time best friend right now.

[Meli (Blush + Jelly)]

This letter made me remember of my childhood best friend. We also "broke up" at the beginning of high school. We were also like sisters, I almost lived in here house during the summer and was always included in their family plans (and vice versa).

I am going to write her a letter today...I think it will be back many great memories.

[Laura.]

jena, you are such a good writer. i can see it all, really, and it takes me right back to childhood sleepovers with girls i haven't seen or heard from in years. (um, seriously, have you ever thought of writing a book?) this is really haunting, like the way alyssa says her long-lost friends haunt her thoughts and dreams--like i'm sure we all feel when our deep memories are stirred by things like this. keep at the writing, please! and keep sharing it with us!
the only thing i can say falls under the heading of 'make/do' right now is an ongoing project: i'm upholstering my little sofa. which is a ridiculous project, but really kind of manageable, since i have a good (yes, long-time) friend helping me every step of the way. it's almost finished! http://laurabrownart.wordpress.com/2011/02/28/getting-there/

[Brittany]

Aw, she is going to love reading that! You do have a good way with words (obviously, as you have a successful blog :o) and anyone would love to receive as nice a letter as this!

My project that came to completion this week was my very first batch of homebrew! I tried some last night for the first time and it was So Good. I'm calling it Halo Cat Hefe, after our cat.

I also bought a bread machine on CraigsList on Friday and have used it three times in five days. I'm making beer & smoked cheddar bread right now and it smells sooooo good!

[Brittany]

OMG, HAI RENAI! Where's my yogurt maker? ;o)

[emery jo]

awww.... you guys were like two peas in a pod. what a beautiful letter!!

[Laura.]

homebrew and bread? i think i just found my new best friend.

[Soledad]

Jena, you are the greatest. You make me feel things, you surprise me. I'll read your blog forever.

Anyways, I started making a stained glass window!!! It's for a class in college, but it doesn't matter, I'm having so much fun I don't care about grades or anything. It's very fun indeed to make/do something different, out of the normal business.

[shannon]

wow, this is so sweet! what fun memories, ah the things we do as kids, so silly! and how lovely you remember it so well! she must have been a real special friend. i hope you hear from her!

[Lindsey @ Yarnia]

I love this! It's really amazing how often my childhood best friend pops into my head, considering I haven't talked to her in probably 15 years, even just scenes from her house setting the backdrop to my thoughts as I'm reading/knitting/thinking/whatever. It's occurred to me over the years how having that kind of connection to someone was like a little version of being in love; I had no idea how unique that kind of friendship was at the time. Thank you for drawing it closer to the surface!